April has been a funny month for me. Record breaking bad weather has been doing it’s best to hamper training and generally make life as miserable as possible for everyone. As a result, spinning at Lifescycle still formed a large part of my regular riding, upping my sessions to two hours when possible. I had hoped that pleasant evenings would have allowed more post-work rides but that was not to be. However I was feeling constantly stronger with my spin sessions and my weekend rides were becoming longer, quicker and easier. I was seeing improvement and this is quite a strong motivator.
Mid-April saw my first sportive of the year, the Tour o’ the Borders. To say conditions were bad does not really do justice to just how bad they were and much has been written in the cycling press about it. Strangely this to date could well one of the most enjoyable days to date I have ever had on a bike. After I got so wet I couldn’t possibly become wetter and faced up to the fact that I was in for a really tough day, I seemed to zone in and just get on with it. Thinking about how I deal with situations like that, and a similar situation when mountain biking in Peru, I think I am well able to just get on with things when they get tough. Though I hopeful for nothing but good weather come the Tour, if tougher times do arise hopefully this will be my time to shine and lead the way a bit, encouraging other on.
Feeling somewhat pleased with myself following the Tour o’ the Borders and therefore more motivated, my confidence and motivation were blown apart. Collecting some Tour de Force cycle gear from the trip organisers I had been discussing the highs and lows of my training so far. The following day I received an email expressing concern at my ability to complete the event. I knew that I had not done as much training as I would have liked, but things were improving and for once I had been feeling more capable. These comments hit me badly and I spent the week feeling really down and confused, wondering if I should withdraw from the tour. It wasn’t that I disagreed with anything that was said, in fact it was maybe more that I agreed with all that was said. More importantly, in my mind anyway, I began to feel that I may become a huge burden on everyone else on the trip, a though that I had great difficulty with.
Come the weekend I had to decide whether I was actually going to do my second sportive that I had only just signed up for, the Tour de Lauder. I really didn’t feel like it, just wanting to give up and come late Friday evening was prepared to text Trevor and tell him I wasn’t going to make it. Fortunately, stubbornness kicked in and I decided to do it. I say fortunately as this turned out to be a good day for me and some positivity started to return.
It wasn’t that anything really had changed really, I still understood the enormity of the task ahead of me, but it refreshed in my mind how much I wanted to do this. Though I new this wouldn’t be the end of the issue, I knew that if I was to undertake this I had to do all I could to improve further.
I should at this point express my thanks and gratitude to Sarah (trip organiser) and Phil (lead cyclist). They really went out of their way, giving me their time and experience in looking at where I was, my options and were critical where they had to be and encouraging also.
The end of the month also saw me ride my tour bike for the first time. I had had it for a while but not used it, not wanting to ruin it in the bad conditions. However, literally a couple of hundred metres from my door saw my winter training bike puncture and I returned home, making the choice to change bike rather than waste time fixing the puncture. What a revelation, so much quicker, better handling and comfortable than the winter bike. The following day I took it out again for my first 100 mile ride.